I havent blogged for a while now...but I have been feeling so unsettled in my heart. Trying to find that peace in God through all these struggles and trying to stop using my own power to do all things. I pray that my hurt will be healed and most importantly, I pray for FULL TRUST in God in everything.

Meaningless Side Story:
I live in the Princeton townhomes and its pretty friendly and nice neighbors and all. And the other day when I came home from work, a little girl with a big backpack eating a blue popsicle was walking towards my direction, and to my surprise she asks, "Whats your name?"
"Raphael, and what is your name?"
"Alexia, I am 7 years old and I go to Turle Rock Elementary. I live over there, we just moved here from Oregon, and I have a little brother and 2 older sisters, and my brother is sleeping in the house and my mom wants me to stay outside cuz I am eating this popsicle and she doesnt want me to spill it all over inside the house. My friends at school are Carla, Susan, and Joseph, and Joseph just lives right there and I go play with him sometimes."
"OH.....uhmm....thats cool, so your mom lets you just walk around by yourself?"
"Yeah, cuz she doesnt want me to spill this popsicle all over the house. Oh yeah, and my brother is sleeping inside and my mom doesnt want to me to make all this noise and wake him. He screams and cries when he wakes up, and my mom doesnt want me to wake him. My dad is at work, He works for 5 crowns and he makes food for a whole lot of people who like food."
So as I continue to ask simple questions to her, she answers them, but she continues to keep talking about other things and other things. She is a little sweet outgoing girl, but I wondered why her mom would let her walk outside by herself and talk to whoever she wants to. So I continued to have this little conversation with her where I just let her do most of the talking as I just ask one simple question at a time.

I was reminded of a friend of mine, Tina, who I met in Asian American Studies, this girl who is definitely not shy at all and can have conversations just out of the blue. I remembered a time when I came to class and we sat together, and I was sitting there just quietly, keeping to myself. She asks "Hey!, whats up!? Are you always this quiet?"
"Well kinda.............it depends.......uhmm, how are you?"
"Well I am alright. Do you like to fly kites?? Cuz this past weekend I went kite flying in the beach and then I saw all these other kite flyers and it was cool! I dont know, I just saw movie this past weekend too and it was cool and all, but I felt that the ending could have been better. Oh yeah I went to go visit my friend who was in prison, you know...The Federal Correction Institute & Detention Center...but anyways, I still think she is innocent even though they did find her bloody glove in the alley of her ex-boyfriends house and stuff. But yeah I mean. those kites were fun and just seeing how far they can fly.......................etc..etc.."
"Wow, you must have had a good weekend. Did you do anything else?"
I was just in awe in how many things she can talk about within one question that I had asked...I just sat there in a blank stare trying to keep up and listen, and trying to pay attention to Professor Fujta-Rony in lecture as she was saying "You know, I am not one to gloat, but I did graduate with 4 degrees from Yale and I was one of the first Cambodian Americans to first attend that school.......The video 'Split Horn", every time I watch it, it just grips me and moves me inside and I always feel like a tear rolling down from my eye.......etc..etc.."
"Wow...," I thought.

I say again....meaningless side story blog dedicated to your entertainment Tina. I know you've been wanting to read a new blog for sometime, so here you go.
posted by raphael at 12:50 PM